After ten years or so of being far enough away to miss every birthday and every minor turning of events, I can say with a fullness of my breath that I feel quite content in our 3.5 jaunt to visit family. Because while the big holidays of the year are always something to reminisce over, it’s really all those in between days that become a part of your little history. Of course it still doesn’t feel close enough, but it feels so, so much better. Raising babies without loved ones near by is hard. Harder than I ever assumed. There are no sick days, no one to help so you can go to the dentist, no one to grab you that bottle of wine if you are all alone and its been a long day and you put your kids to bed before you remembered you were fresh out of the red stuff that would soothe your wary mind. (Oh sure I lay off when I am pregnant, I can just recall this being a time in particular when I wanted my mommy.) Oh yes, these are little problems, of that I am sure, but it is something worth mentioning. I have so many mama friends that are doing it solo, or doing it near no one, or doing it while their husbands are deployed, and all of them, I mean all of them are doing it with a smile on their face. Not everyday, but most of them. And that is all you can hope for.
But, now I have this closeness in proximity that truly changes things for me. This weekend, the boys and I took an easy drive south, where the temperatures soothed us with an extra ten degrees, where a few meals were cooked for us, where we got to celebrate the existence of the very special Bapcia. Oh she may not have been all together surprised, (The first words out of Miles mouth upon arriving were, “Did you even know we were having a surprise party for you?”) she was most certainly pleased. Surrounded by dear old friends, delicious food, lovely gifts and lots of laughs, the evening was a sparkly perfection.
This woman. This woman, I have so much I could say about her. So much its overwhelming to even start. She is my best friend. She is my confidant, my therapist, my inspiration. She is honest and clear and bright and beautiful and I am so, so very lucky to have her in my life.
The whole shebang was impeccable timing too I should add, because not 24 hours later both my parents were struck with this winters evil germ: The stomach flu. Having just had it two weeks prior, I knew this was no joke. It is 24 hours of traumatizing no way around it: vomiting. Just plain old awful. So, we did what was best and packed up and left them to fend for themselves, because despite my efforts, the boys are loud and messy and well, I am sure its a bit more peaceful to recover in solitude. I left with a bit of jealousy that when I had the flu, I didn’t get the rest I so so wanted. But this is the plight of motherhood, and that’s that. But, I had to admit that the envy was there. But most of all, I left with a happiness in my heart that it is not such a long trip and that we will get to enjoy the big blue sea, and my parents welcoming smiles, and my nieces bum scooch way of transportation, and my brothers joyful laugh and my sister in laws silly antics very soon.
Happy Birthday Mama